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The Justice League of Northern North America

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A Trubama fanfic. Obama and Trudeau are superheroes with a panda sidekick. I don’t know why.

Justin Trudeau Barack Obama

 

When the cameras were gone, Obama turned to Trudeau. “Shall we now get to the real point of your visit?”

“Making sweet passionate love?” Trudeau’s boyish blue eyes sparkled.

Obama’s smile-lines crinkled. “I was gonna say, defeating our arch nemesis, but, that could work too.”

“Get an Oval Office, guys,” said the adorable fluffy panda sitting in the corner. “I’m sitting right here. Don’t sully my innocent panda ears.”

“You’re kidding, right?” said Trudeau. He turned to Obama. “You should’ve heard this one’s potty mouth after she met Rob Ford.”

Obama brushed a tousled curl away from the Canadian’s perfect face. “Well. Panda sensibilities aside, we need to make a plan to defeat him.”

“We could hug him until he becomes a better person?” suggested Panda.

The President and the Prime Minister exchanged sad glances. “If only the world worked like that,” said Obama.

“Can I have a hug to make me feel better?” asked Panda.

“Oh, go on then.”

Obama, Trudeau and Panda all hugged. It’s a good thing the internet wasn’t there. It might have shattered into a million pieces.

After an hour’s serious discussion, and more hugging, the trio had a plan to defeat their evil nemesis. All they had to do was set the trap.

A few hours later, they lay in wait, hiding behind a stage set with a number of podiums.

“Are you sure he’ll show?” whispered Trudeau.

“He can never resist a debate,” whispered Obama. “It’s like catnip to him.”

Sure enough, moments later, Trump appeared, lurching onto the stage in an exoskeleton made out of hair. “I AM HERE TO DEBATE YOU AND TELL YOU ABOUT MY WIENER!” he screeched. “NO MEXICANS! I AM THE GREATEST!@

“NOW!” Obama commander.

“Yessir Captain Potus!” agreed Trudeau.

The two heroes – and their panda sidekick – launched into attack mode. Their spandex outfits glistened under the harsh studio lighting. (The panda was not in spandex. That would look ridiculous.)

“Take that!” cried Captain Potus. He threw a bolt of blue light at Trump, setting fire to his hairy exoskeleton.

“And that!” cried Captain Canada, sending waves of sparkles in a cloud that enveloped Trump, lifting him off the ground so that his legs dangled pathetically.

“I love you, Trump, even though you’re a mean man,” called Panda, blowing kisses. “I love everyone. Look at me. I’m adorable.”

With one more bolt of pure blue light, Trump disappeared in a puff of evil.

“We did it!” cried Panda. Then, looking a little doubtful. “You didn’t kill him, did you?”

“Nope,” said Obama. “We just sent him to a parallel universe where everyone is as hateful as him and each person is surrounded by a wall a mile high. And made of hair.”

“Well, that’s ok,” said Panda.

And they all hugged and hugged and the internet exploded, happily ever after.

 

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